Along the waywe ran into Mrs. Nelson, who was out getting her mail."Who's the hottie, Darlene?" she asked my mom."The hottie is my SON, Carol. Look at...what JimCarlson's scouts did to him!" she said spinning mearound so that Mrs. Nelson could read my ass cheeks."I'd be upset too," our neighbor sympathized, "thatmagic marker is really hard to get off... but Tommie,I must say... you look absolutely stunning. Don't youagree, Darlene?" Yes, thank you Carol... it just makes me so mad thatthese kids. We knocked most of them down fairly quickly because of the superiority of the .30-06 bullet over the Russian AK-47 ammunition that they were using. Of course, our mortars made a hell of a difference, too. As it turned out, a few of them got smart and ran away; I have no idea how many actually escaped or what they did after they were out of sight.Jess and Alonzo ran to The Hammer as soon as we had the situation well in hand. Alonzo went because he was the boss and Jess went because she could. More

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