" I of coursereplied "Yes anything you can suggest." "Good," she replied, "First Ihave made an appointment at the 'Perfect Nails' shop for you to have...our fingernails shaped and lacquered, more like a woman's, you willalso have a pedicure done at the same time, this will be done Saturdaymorning, in the afternoon we will visit the hairdressers so you can haveyour hair done in a more feminine style, you will also have your eyebrows plucked and shaped. Is that all right with you so far?" I was. I photocopied the report. It totally wasn't something we'd bother to report, not even in a small town rag like the one I worked for, but I had plans...Gloria called at 10 p.m. sharp."I've got bad news for you Gloria. The police officer did file a report. It's pretty graphic. It says the two of you were 'engaged in heated sexual relations' when he found you," I lied."Oh no! I can't believe it! Why?" she sobbed. "Why would he write that?" Don't be to hard on the cop. He's just doing his job," I. More

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