“Please Ashley…won’t you come in and let me explain about last week,” I suddenly said. I was almost shocked when she shrugged and stepped past...me into my foyer. “Sit down…can I get you something to drink,” I offered. “Um, …no thanks.” There was one of those awkward silent moments before I just blurted out an explanation. I hadn’t even thought about what I would say, so I think I surprised both of us when I said, “I apologize for what you saw…I didn’t mean for it to happen, I wasn’t using my. There was the usual feeling of loss and fear of insanity and depression. All of these emotions came crashing down on me each morning when I realized that Jack had not really been there. That it had all been a dream. Intellectually I knew what had been happening every night wasn't real, it was just that... it 'seemed' so real.The first night that it happened, had been a week after Jack died. Of course, we hadn't made love for the last 6 months of his life, he was just too sick. That first night. More

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