John ordered a scotch..decided he needed a double instead and watched the party walking in. As he watched John wondered how long the couple would stay...married. Longer than he had he decided. But almost everyones marriage lasted longer than his had. He knew deep down not to marry a vanilla girl but he did?.and paid for it?both emotionally and financially. It had been a while now?more than five years since his divorce and the beginning of what seemed like an endless parade of subs. There had been. I never fussed with salt or lemon, just drank the shit straight. I didn’t drink it to feel good, so the gut-twisting effect suited me fine. I was drinking to get in touch with my demons. God, I missed her. I sometimes had to strain to remember her voice and tonight was one of those nights. I was ashamed of myself. I promised I’d never forget and here I was trying to remember her laugh. I should hear that laugh every day. I should see her smiling at our baby. I should be listening to her talk. More

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