When I was dresses she asked me if I was out of perfume because she wanted to apply some to me. I told her that there must be one in my travel bag. Sh... took it out and after applying it on me applied it on herself and said, "I want to be able to breath in your smell all day." Yeah, right.Another victory when he turned up at the office carrying a woman's handbag. I am sure that he made all the right noises to justify carrying it but I had a picture of him walking into his office with a woman's. On the way home, the husband asked his wife. “What did the doctor say?” “He said you’re going to die” she replied.Teacher: “Johnny, can you tell me the name of 3 great kings who have brought happiness and peace into people’s lives?” Little Johnny: Drin-king, smo-king, and fuc-king.I bumped into my ex in town earlier. I said “How’s your new bloke?” “He’s twice the man you are” she sneered “what about your new woman?” I said “Thankfully she’s half the woman you are... ?”Our eyes met across the. More

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