. then maybe you can thank me properly for your gift ... on your knees!”“Oh my God Dan ... surely you don’t think ... oh god ... please ... I re...lly need a drink and a cigarette Dan” Well aware his Aunt was a regular smoker and drinker, this was just the cue Dan had hoped for and holding his camera phone, made his way across the large lounge to the door, where he said to Vicky. “Sure thing Auntie Vicky ... I’m going to get both those things for you ... I know how much you enjoy vodka with lots. Remember, too, the STD test is non-negotiable.”“But you wouldn’t with me?” Crystal asked in a voice that showed she was both angry and offended.“Not based on what I’ve heard from you, no. And it has nothing to do with you not being attractive. You are. You’re cute, and that dress showed me you have a nice body. But we’re not compatible. I just don’t think it would be much fun.”“I AM fun!” Crystal protested.“Yes, as a friend. As a date. Let me ask you this. How do you have sex?”“The normal way.. More

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