Did he drown?”“No,” he said, “he choked on a sock.”The wife came out of the bathroom and said “I have just shaved my bits and you know wha... that means don’t you?”I said “Yeah, the bloody plug hole is blocked again.”An Arab diplomat visiting the US for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was not used to the salt in American foods (French fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of. "That started a series of updates, as each Minister finished their calls."The army have moved in to seal off Faslane and all of the other military bases," said the Finance Minister. "I've got messages from four different chief executives of big companies telling me that they have been warned not to cooperate with us. The nuclear power stations have also been surrounded by army units." Two minesweepers and a submarine have taken control of the fishery protection ships," said the Environment. More

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