A French policeman stops the Englishman’s car and asks if he has been drinking.With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been drinkin... all day, that his daughter got married that morning, and that he drank champagne and a few bottles of wine at the reception, and many single malt scotches there-after.Quite upset, the policeman proceeds to breathe test the Englishman and verifies that he is indeed completely hammered.He asks the Englishman if he knows why, under French law, he is. One of them let out a wolf whistle and nothing has ever thrilled me like his obvious appreciation of the way I looked.Mistress was behind the wheel by the time I got to the car and after I opened the door I realized I wasn't going to be able to just jump in the way I normally did. I stood there confused for a minute trying to figure out how to get into the car at all much less do it in a ladylike manner. Normally I stick one foot in and just follow it in sliding into the seat and ducking under. More

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