You needsomeone to talk with and I cannot do it as Doug. I am too scared to openup as him. I have to do it as Marci."He continued with, "When you came...home from therapy and I started to bemore receptive to you talking after I came back downstairs. That was forI put on panties, pantyhose and a cami. I am not proud of it, so I didnot tell you. I should be strong enough to talk about emotions without acrutch, but I am not. I am sorry that you thought I wanted to hurt youand you being leery of me. It was after 10 days and the marriage preparations started. We tried to keep this as simple, secret as possible and the marriage would take place in the ashram with very few people. During these days, maaji still did not look into my eyes or speak properly, and I was worried about what was going through her mind.One day she said, “Beta, can we talk in private?” We both went to the balcony.My mother-in-law said, “As you know the circumstances of this marriage, I am not sure if I. More

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