I don’t know how you could avoid feeling contempt. I should be ashamed of considering leaving a world as beautiful as this one. But I despise myself...when I consider that I cannot manage to live one single day without feeling I’m a total and utter disgrace and causing problems for the other people around me. I know you get furious with me. It seems like I want you to show a strong emotion, because I do it to you so often, almost every day. Why is that? I start the argument and then I cannot. She must of exhausted me out because i fell asleep before she returned.I woke up the next morning and saw her lying there next to me, all angelic, sleeping. I felt a little dirty (in a nice way) so i went for a shower.In the shower, i was still kinda giddy after the night before and was replaying it in my head. Thats when i saw a shadow on the other side of the shower curtain. I dont know why, but i was petrified and daren't speak. What was going through her head? Was i good? was i bad? was i. More

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