Even though neither of us was really interested in dating others, we kept that open as an option. I wasn’t crazy about that plan because I was getti...g pretty attached to her but I didn’t want to be too possessive and realized this was something she wanted and needed to do for herself. Lana worked in the cosmetics department at a department store and about four months into our relationship Lana she said she was going to the employee’s only Christmas party. She dressed at my place and she looked. He grew morose and uncommunicative, and took to spending long periods away from our apartment. Although it was difficult for me to see him physically disappear in this way, it was even more tormenting to have him present in the house in body only, while the essence of him, the beautiful spirit that I loved so desperately, had obviously moved out. I did not confront him at first, hoping as I did that his withdrawal was only a matter of some stray mood, or some necessary passage of the artist. More

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