”I laughed. “Yeah, that's Mel. I'll tell you, man, I'm amazed you get away with it. Ask Jake if you don't believe me – Mel is usually a certifie..., gold-plated bitch if you try to have sex with her before noon. I'm surprised she hasn't ripped your balls off.”Jim's grin got wider. “Not for me, buddy. She purrs like a pussy cat.”“Fuck off,” I told him, but I smiled as I said it. We both laughed.“Talking of randy wives,” I resumed. “I just walked in on yours getting spit-roasted by Pete and. As bad as my handicap is, I felt pretty good about my swing with a driver from that range. The girl walks in, looking like a drowned mouse (that’s been beaten with a baseball bat). As soon as she was inside, the mouse asks if she can change and then, without waiting for a damn response, walks back to the bathroom to do it. I took a minute to consider the situation and couldn’t make heads or fucking tails of it, so I did the logical thing and went back upstairs to continue writing my novel.. More

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